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时间: 2019年12月08日 16:12

� � I also did some critical work for the Pall Mall 鈥?as I did also for The Fortnightly. It was not to my taste, but was done in conformity with strict conscientious scruples. I read what I took in hand, and said what I believed to be true 鈥?always giving to the matter time altogether incommensurate with the pecuniary result to myself. In doing this for the Pall Mall, I fell into great sorrow. A gentleman, whose wife was dear to me as if she were my own sister; was in some trouble as to his conduct in the public service. He had been blamed, as he thought unjustly, and vindicated himself in a pamphlet. This he handed to me one day, asking me to read it, and express my opinion about it if I found that I had an opinion. I thought the request injudicious, and I did not read the pamphlet. He met me again, and, handing me a second pamphlet, pressed me very hard. I promised him that I would read it, and that if I found myself able I would express myself 鈥?but that I must say not what I wished to think, but what I did think. To this of course he assented. I then went very much out of my way to study the subject 鈥?which was one requiring study. I found, or thought that I found, that the conduct of the gentleman in his office had been indiscreet; but that charges made against himself affecting his honour were baseless. This I said, emphasising much more strongly than was necessary the opinion which I had formed of his indiscretion 鈥?as will so often be the case when a man has a pen in his hand. It is like a club or sledge-hammer 鈥?in using which, either for defence or attack, a man can hardly measure the strength of the blows he gives. Of course there was offence 鈥?and a breaking off of intercourse between loving friends 鈥?and a sense of wrong received, and I must own, too, of wrong done. It certainly was not open to me to whitewash with honesty him whom I did not find to be white; but there was no duty incumbent on me to declare what was his colour in my eyes 鈥?no duty even to ascertain. But I had been ruffled by the persistency of the gentleman鈥檚 request 鈥?which should not have been made 鈥?and I punished him for his wrong-doing by doing a wrong myself. I must add, that before he died his wife succeeded in bringing us together. He looked at her earnestly. Her face had been in shadow until now, but as she moved into the sunlight, he saw that the lines had sharpened in the pale, wan face, and that there was the stamp of wasting disease in the hollow cheeks, and about the sunken eyes, and in the almost bloodless lips. As he looked at her in friendliest commiseration those pathetic grey eyes鈥攚hose expression had baffled his power of interpretation hitherto鈥攆illed suddenly with tears, and in the next moment she clasped her hands before her face in an agony of grief. In the preceding pages I have given a short record of the first twenty-six years of my life 鈥?years of suffering, disgrace, and inward remorse. I fear that my mode of telling will have left an idea simply of their absurdities; but, in truth, I was wretched 鈥?sometimes almost unto death, and have often cursed the hour in which I was born. There had clung to me a feeling that I had been looked upon always as an evil, an encumbrance, a useless thing 鈥?as a creature of whom those connected with him had to be ashamed. And I feel certain now that in my young days I was so regarded. Even my few friends who had found with me a certain capacity for enjoyment were half afraid of me. I acknowledge the weakness of a great desire to be loved 鈥?of a strong wish to be popular with my associates. No child, no boy, no lad, no young man, had ever been less so. And I had been so poor, and so little able to bear poverty. But from the day on which I set my foot in Ireland all these evils went away from me. Since that time who has had a happier life than mine? Looking round upon all those I know, I cannot put my hand upon one. But all is not over yet. And, mindful of that, remembering how great is the agony of adversity, how crushing the despondency of degradation, how susceptible I am myself to the misery coming from contempt 鈥?remembering also how quickly good things may go and evil things come 鈥?I am often again tempted to hope, almost to pray, that the end may be near. Things may be going well now 鈥? Ah! said she, "I must have pressed and twisted the ring about, unconsciously. I was thinking of something else." 免费多人疯狂做人爱视频-最新电影 Said Miss Chubb to her old woman servant, "Well, the Honourable Mrs. Algernon Errington is very distangy looking, Martha. That's a French word that means鈥攎eans out of the common, aristocratic, you know. Very distangy, certainly! But she lacks sentiment, in my opinion. And her outline is very sharp, Martha. I prefer a rounder contour, both of face and figure. Some of the ladies found fault with her because of her low dress. But that鈥攁s I happen to know鈥攊s quite the custom with our upper classes in town. Mrs. Figgins's鈥攚ife of the Bishop of Plumbunn, you know, Martha鈥擬rs. Figgins's sister, who married Sir William Wick, of the Honourable Company of Tallow Chandlers, I believe鈥攖hat's a kind of City society for dining sumptuously, Martha; you mustn't suppose it has anything to do with selling tallow candles! Well, Lady Wick sat down to dinner in low, every day of her life!" I've come to say a word to Seth, if it may be without putting you out, said old Maxfield, with a sidelong nod of the head, that was intended as a general salute to the company. 鈥榊es, sir.鈥? My dear fellow, if there is in the United Kingdom a young man of three-and-twenty who can comfortably dispense with romance in his wife, our friend Errington is that young man. �